V: Better late than never
If I don’t post today it’ll be two weeks that will have gone by that I haven’t posted in my self love weekly series. I made myself a promise and I intend on following through. My promise to myself… to follow through with following through. *nervous gulp*
Goals goals goals- GOLAZOOOOOO!
It’s been pretty quiet lately and I’m happy about it. I think I needed some circumstantial silence to let myself settle into this new lifestyle of not entertaining these women. 😅. I decided to go over my goals from 6/21-7/21, take an inventory of what I accomplished and reset the ones I haven’t completed and mark off the ones I did. I’m proud to say that 10/12 goals were met, it seems the goal that will be the bane of my existence is losing weight. 🙄🙄🙄. BIGGEST EYE ROLL EVER. Some of the highlights from my accomplishments- well I applied AND interviewed for the sheet metal workers union apprenticeship, I paid of 90% of my tickets, I saved 500$ instead of $150. I became accountable and consistent arriving to work on time.
Areas of opportunity: nutrition- I haven’t been properly feeding my body and I know that the moment I start to I’m going to have such a shitty rebound effect that will make me gain weight. I do have a consult scheduled with performance Athletix behind my job so I can literally leave work and work out. They also do nutritional coaching so we’re in there baby! Super excited about it.
About accountability
Accountability has always been super hard for me- especially since I learned to manipulate and work all of the things around me. So like my whole life *double gulp* but I can say that right now I’m seeking it- not in a sick self punishing way but in the let’s be right sized and not let my ego convince me that I’m doing better or worse than I actually am. A lot of my life my ego has told me I’m underperforming which is bad- really bad- cause it messes with my self esteem and triggers my self destruct tendencies. But even worse is when my ego tells me I’m over performing or doing everything right. That’s when I start getting complacent and resting on my laurels- which leads to me dropping the ball usually cause when you’re to lazy to move shit of course you’re gonna lose the ball.
To be continued…
So I’m going to continue writing my self love series and sharing it with the world. It feels therapeutic to have a catalogue of my adventures and my struggles throughout this journey. I haven’t decided if I’m gonna keep it a weekly thing or if I’m gonna start publishing biweekly… either way I’m not stopping. Finding my voice in my words is one of the reasons I’m doing this- I can’t find my voice if I’m not writing. So write I shall.
Day by Day 